7 Ways To Make Solo Parenting Easier

When I told a friend that I was going to be solo parenting my “3 under 4” while my youngest was just 2-3 months old, she mentioned that in her case, they would always get help from the grandparents if one parent had to step out for the evening. Unfortunately, that wasn’t an option for us and I’ve never actually felt like it wasn’t possible to solo parent any number of babies I had.

My solo parenting journey started quite early. When Globy was just a few hours old, my husband decided to go to the office, leaving us alone in the hospital for a few hours. It’s a Japanese thing and maybe worth a story another day. Like any parent, I had to deal with what was in front of me and find a way to make it work.

Here are some of the strategies that have helped me manage solo parenting, especially for longer stretches of time and not just a few hours or a day:

1. Prepare Your Kids

Even though they are small, children understand a lot more than we think. I always sit my kids down before their dad goes on a trip and explain that we’ll be on our own for a while. I prepare them by telling them about the upcoming changes in routine and ask for their help in sticking together as a team to support each other during this phase.

Before my first business trip, I drew a schedule for my oldest daughter showing the days I’d be gone. This idea was inspired by Jeanelle Teves’s countdown calendar and a close friend who is both a mom and a corporate leader. Having a tangible schedule gave my daughter a sense of control and understanding of what was happening.

2. Prepare as Much as You Can

Whatever can be done beforehand, do it. Grocery shopping, laundry, house cleaning—anything that reduces the load during solo parenting time is worth doing in advance.

For example, before a three-day work trip, I ensured that my kids’ closets were stocked with clean clothes, the laundry backlog was reduced, and their pool bag was packed.

3. Prepone Decision-Making

When you’re with small children, you’re constantly making decisions, even if they’re small ones: Can they eat something? Can they open a drawer? Are they allowed to do this or that? It’s a nonstop evaluation of situations and your diagnostic skills as a parent will be tested.

To save energy, I recommend making as many decisions as possible before your solo parenting stint. For example, plan meals in advance. You don’t need to pre-cook, but knowing what you’ll prepare can save mental energy.

Similarly, plan activities based on whether it’s a period of school or holidays. During a two-week holiday when my husband was away, I planned indoor and outdoor activities ahead of time to avoid having to think on the spot while juggling everything else.

4. Stick to the Routine

When kids are very small, sticking to a routine is incredibly helpful in my opinion. A routine provides structure, helping everyone—including you—know what to expect.

With small children especially, the day is already built around their schedule of meals and sleep: breakfast, snack, lunch, nap, snack, dinner. So then you have to fill the times in betwee with activities.

If they go to daycare, they are used to getting out of the house in the morning. It can be nice to not do this or to do it to keep the routine. In our daycare, they often go outside for a walk, to play on the playground or in the park. Taking them out in the mornings therefore seems to be their routine and I often find their mood more relaxed when we do leave the house for something before lunch.

Following their usual routine makes navigating the days of solo parenting much easier for both, parent and kids.

5. Time Boxing

Children thrive when you’re in control, and they benefit from clear guidance. In addition to following a routine, time boxing can be a lifesaver when you’re solo parenting.

Time Boxing is a Time Management Strategy often used in corporate settings. It involves setting a specific amount of time to complete a task. The strategy suggests to work on the task for the pre-set time and stop working on it when the time is up, whether the task is complete or not.

In observing our daily routine, I have realized what the different time blocks or boxes for each activity are. When do we have to get up, in order to have breakfast and get ready to leave out the house in a relaxed way? When should I start cooking dinner to get the kids into the shower for them to be in bed in time?

In some way, I am sure every parent knows this and follows their routine. When I am solo parenting it helps me to really focus on the points in time to ensure the ‘tasks’ are completed in time. This way, I’m not scrambling or rushing through the day.

6. Plan for Adult Interaction

Solo parenting can be isolating, especially when you’re not ready to use a babysitter and are confined to the home with a newborn. Everyone has busy lives with work and children and might not be spontaneously available. Sometimes, the only adult interactions I have in a day are with kindergarten teachers and supermarket cashiers. While those interactions are better than none, they’re not enough if you’re solo parenting for more than a few days.

To avoid feeling isolated, it’s important to plan social interactions proactively. Schedule playdates with other parents, so you can have adult conversations while the kids play together. If playdates aren’t possible, consider inviting a friend or family member over for a coffee or meal. This gives you some much-needed adult time without needing to leave the house.

For virtual options, set up regular video or phone calls with friends or relatives. It might not replace in-person interactions entirely, but it can still help you feel connected.

7. Stay Aware And Focused

Keep reminding yourself that the solo parenting phase is temporary. If you know relief is coming, it’s easier to focus your energy on the present without feeling overwhelmed. Take pride in managing things on your own and stay aware of the progress you’re making.

Solo parenting is challenging, but with preparation, routines, and support, it can also be a time to grow and bond with your kids. How do you make solo parenting easier for you and your family?