From Playroom to Boardroom: Mastering Tantrums with Tots and Teams
Life has thrown me some curveballs lately—dealing with tantrums from both my kids and my team members has been a rollercoaster. But every cloud has a silver lining, right? As time’s been a little scarce these days, I just described the basic situations to CoPilot and asked them to write the post. Due to said scarcity this is the result from my first prompt incl. the title. I will come back to this post and add more information to especially the employee tantrums’ situations but am leaving it as is as a reminder of this time to myself.
It still fascinates me how much the journey as a mother has prepared me for managing a team in a large multinational corporation and vice versa. This week I have also learned that drawing these comparisons and turning them into posts might be where I leave all the emotions coming at me that I have to handle, calm down, re-direct, etc.
While not perfect, I hope you enjoy the idea as another part in my series of how motherhood is your Complimentary Management Training.
Tantrum Time: Kids vs. Employees
1. Understand the Root Cause
Kids: When my 5-year-old throws a tantrum because her favorite toy went missing, I know it’s not just about the toy—there’s an underlying feeling of loss and frustration.
Employees: Similarly, when a staff member breaks down in a meeting, it’s often about more than just the immediate issue. Maybe they’re feeling overwhelmed with their workload or dealing with personal stress.
Approach: In both cases, the first step is to understand the root cause of the tantrum. Empathy and active listening go a long way. Validate their feelings, provide a listening ear, ask questions and try to get to the bottom of their frustrations.
2. Maintain Composure
Kids: When my 3-year-old throws a fit because bedtime is approaching, staying calm helps de-escalate the situation.
Employees: When a team member complains about feeling overworked, losing my temper won’t help. Instead, keeping my cool, trying to understand the root cause and addressing their concerns calmly can defuse the tension.
Approach: Maintaining composure is crucial. Whether you’re dealing with a toddler or an employee, staying calm sets the tone for the conversation and shows that you’re in control.
3. Set Clear Boundaries
Kids: My 2-year-old needs to understand that hitting is not acceptable, no matter how upset they are. Setting clear boundaries helps them understand acceptable behavior.
Employees: When a team member isn’t happy with a new process, it’s essential to explain why the change is necessary and the benefits it brings. Setting clear boundaries and expectations helps everyone stay on the same page.
Approach: Clear communication of boundaries and expectations is key. Whether you’re managing a child’s behavior or implementing a new work process, everyone needs to know what’s acceptable and what’s not.
4. Offer Solutions and Alternatives
Kids: When my kids are upset because they can’t have ice cream before dinner, I offer them a healthy snack instead.
Employees: When a team member feels overworked, I explore options like delegating tasks or providing additional support.
Approach: Offering solutions and alternatives can help soothe frustrations. By providing options, you show that you’re willing to work with them to find a resolution.
5. Follow Up
Kids: After a tantrum, I check in with my kids to see how they’re feeling and reinforce positive behavior.
Employees: After addressing a team member’s concerns, I follow up to ensure they’re coping better and to address any lingering issues.
Approach: Following up is essential. It shows that you care and are committed to their well-being, whether they’re your children or your team members.
Conclusion
Motherhood has taught me that managing tantrums—whether from my little ones or my team—requires patience, empathy, an inquisitive mind and a calm demeanor. By understanding the root cause, maintaining composure, setting clear boundaries, offering solutions, and following up, you can turn these challenging moments into opportunities for growth and connection.
Stay tuned for more insights on how the lessons learned in motherhood prepare you for a role in leadership in the corporate world!
