How to fly alone with 3 small kids

Recently, a family event made me take my three girls on an intercontinental solo flight from Japan to Germany as my husband couldn’t join. I wasn’t worried about it for the most part as we had taken flights with them several times before. Given that I was traveling alone, I did try to consider more aspects in more detail beforehand though. 

Do tips from flying with kids vary very much from tips for flying with kids alone? After having done both I would say there’s a few insights gained from traveling with small kids alone versus with another adult but mainly the tips are the same. 

Flight Selection

While date, time and process are obviously the most deciding factors in booking your flight, here are a few other points to consider especially when travelling with little ones.

Direct Flight

A direct flight might seem best at first. Fastest connection, no hassle to get off and on another plane. Depending on your child (and your self), take off and landing might be troublesome to their ears or stomachs so that a direct flight with less of those is preferable. A direct flight might however be very costly and long.

Stop Over

An indirect flight might be a nice way to break down a very long flight into two shorter flights with the opportunity to see a new place, in car you have time to spare. 

For a layover make sure there is enough time to move from one plane and gate to the next, taking into consideration whether you have to pass passport control and security check again or not. 

As an interculturalist I am also starting to think that depending on where you stop might have an effect on how calm or busy your layover is simply due to the nature of how cultures are louder, quieter, more or less organized.

Airplane Type & Seat Arrangements

Check the plane and seating arrangement before booking if possible. Whether you can sit in one row or are separated across various rows can make a huge difference in how you can take of your kids, especially during take off and landing. When flying with three little ones, I started wondering what the best seat distribution would be. The three of them in one row with a window seat so that there is only one exit with me across the isle. All four of us in one row? Split over two rows behind each other?

Child Friendliness

Some airlines offer little toys, activity books, crayons or other things to kids. Others do not and most of the times, the duration for which the toys last is limited. Do some research on the airline and their services for kids to manage everyone’s expectations.

Below you can see what we received during a flight with Emirates and Turkish Airlines. FinnAir didn’t provide anything for kids. What airlines do you have experience with and what did they have for kids?

Tips For Your Carry On

Everyone will try to tell you about the ultimate set of toy, pre-packaged and ready for you to purchase to have a hassle free flight with small kids. Truth is what you bring should meet their current preferences and interests.

Activities

If possible, bring their favourite activities and what they are currently interested in. E.g. I am lucky that my three girls are into colouring, arts and crafts and bedazzling. I bring a bunch of colouring books, color pencils, drawing tablet and too many sticker sheets. They are easy to pack as they don’t take up a lot of space. The stickers also proved valuable to share with other parents whose daughter was getting upset towards the end of the flight.

Bring whatever makes them comfortable for their sleep routine on the plane. Their favourite blankey, plushy or whatever else it is. To keep some normalcy and maybe increase the chance that they will sleep, try to stick to as much of your routine as possible. I.e. after dinner, go brush your teeth, read a book, then it’s lights off (in line with what’s happening in the plane of course).

Snacks

While planes provide special kids sets, there is a chance that your child will not enjoy the food for whatever reason. Or you don’t want them to eat the food for health reasons. As we all know hungry kids are the most unpleasant. Bring many snacks that will sustain them until they will get a proper meal again. Things that they know and like will increase their feeling of comfort and distract from the new surrounding.

Mobility

With a 2 year old and a 3.5 year old that at times is not excited about walking I had to prepare for how to transport them from one plane to the next. If I placed one in a pram and carried the other one, it would mean I needed one hand free for pushing the pram and shouldn’t have to carry too much other weight or number of bags in addition to Baby. 

Travel Pram

Therefore I brought our Cybex Libelle. It’s great for how easy it is to fold, unfold, fits in overhead compartment, you can open it almost with one hand and one flick very quickly. If I was to buy a travel stroller again I would consider one with a strap for easier carrying like the Stokke YoYo. Also, the Butterfly from Bugaboo seems like a great travel carry on pram.

Over Shoulder Bag

I limited the amount of bags I would have to carry and juggle not just for the transfer and while carrying baby but also for easier boarding and getting off the plane. I had a big sports bag like this one. Inside of it were the activities (see above), snacks (see meals), an extra set of clothes for all three, diapers for baby, wet wipes, toiletries for the flight for all of us and my laptop. Besides that I had a small cross body bag to hold my phone, passports, boarding tickets, etc.

Emergency Kit

I have flown with our kids between 5-10 times, short and long distance flight. They have never had any health related issue. I have heard all the stories though. For my solo flight I wanted to find a balance of being prepared for something to happen without expecting the worst. Needless to say bring all medication your child usually takes. Besides bring a small first aid kit, a set of spare clothes in case of accidents and a few empty plastic bags or zip lock bags. 

Preparation

Preparing them

As always I talk to my kids about what’s going to happen starting a few days before we actually leave. I tell them where we’re going, how many planes we have to take, etc. We read books where kids/toddlers are taking a plane for the first time or general books on airports (this one’s great for the little ones) so that they get ready for what’s coming up. We also go through our rules when traveling (alone) a few times before as a reminder.

Preparing me

As with contractions or solo parenting in general, I believe that mind set and goal orientation is very important. I went into the flight with the expectation of not being able to sleep, knowing that I would have to run around them to help with screens, handle colouring pages and crayons, remind them to sit, find ways to calm them when they get restless, etc. 

Preparing yourself for the worst, rather than an easy flight makes it a lot easier to bear when it actually comes like that. I was able to get at least some 4-5 hours of sleep on our first 13 hour flight.

As with eery long distance flight, drink a lot of water to stay hydrated. Apply your facial care at similar intervals as outside of the flight (makes such a difference to me and how I feel at the end of a long flight). 

How It Went

Let me start by saying the preparation paid off. Thinking through our mobility during the stop over, to how to entertain them, how to keep them fed and where to place diapers and wipes for easy access really paid off. I am amazed how smoothly the travel went overall.

Seating & Meal Time

We ended up with a row of three by the window and me on the other side of the isle. We made it work but it’s difficult to contain your two year old who is in their own seat for the first time during take off and landing, to sit still, to keep the seat belt – having to reach across the isle all the time gets annoying. 

For meals, it’s also pretty impossible to leave the three on their own at this age. I ended up sitting with them, with Baby on my lap so that I could assist all of them with their meals and drinks. I didn’t ask for a meal for myself as I knew we wouldn’t finish all of the meals anyway. Three trays were manageable this way.

Screen Time

Usually I restrict screen time to the weekends and to 60 minutes max. During the flight I am way more lenient but still try to limit the amount of intake at a time by taking breaks even during movies. Not all planes offer proper headphones. Check beforehand so that using screen time to pass time will actually work and not turn into a constant ‘my headphones are falling out’ situation like on this flight. I briefly considered getting them headphones for kids for the flight back.

I saw parents bringing individual tablets per child. These children were definitely more quiet than mine and the parents had more time to themselves.

Sleeping

On the first 13 hours flight we were lucky to have a a free seat next to me. I was able to lie Baby down next to me and secure her this way while Globy and Shibi stretched out over two seats on the other side of the aisle.

During the return flight we didn’t have an extra seat available, the flight didn’t start in the night and falling asleep was significantly harder for them. From finding the right moment to the right position, especially Baby struggled but did eventually sleep for some 5-6 hours.

I see inflatable foot rests advertised by influencers a lot. The idea of them is genius and I wanted to travel with them. Truth unfortunately is that a lot of airlines do not allow them. If you’re interested to take them, call the airline before to check to not get disappointed if you can’t use it.

Stop Over

We had close to two hours at Helsinki Airport for our stop over. Luckily they were all quite rested from their sleep on the first flight and happy to walk so that I could push my bag on the pram with occasionally carrying Baby.

Coming from outside the EU meant we had to go through passport control and security again. This is where it pays off to have explained the procedures to them beforehand.

Intentionally or not, the gates for our flights were both located not too far from the passport control and security. We didn’t see much of it but Helsinki Airport seemed nice.

The cause for the Emergency Kit

It of course had to happen on this solo flight that the last hour of our return flight before landing in Tokyo was the most bumpy flight of my life. While Baby fell asleep from the shaking, Shibi didn’t do so well and had to throw up – alongside at least 3 other passengers. I had tucked everything away to be ready to get off the plane quickly. The bag on the plane did not help a three year old to contain the mess so I would recommend to have an old towel or scarf that you could use to catch the vomit instead. Luckily, people around me were very supportive and passed me tissues from where they could find them. The change of clothes and zip lock bags came in very handy in this situation to quickly clean up afterwards and contain the mess.